DoucheScan(TM)

Posted in CL.  For amusement by me:

The DoucheScan(TM) system is an essential system for single women of all ages. With just a quick zap from DoucheScan(TM) you will have more information about the man you are interested in than you could ever dream of.  All in just under 2 minutes!!!

DoucheScan helps eliminate men with sagging balls, small penises, venereal diseases, mommy complexes, sister fuckers, dog fuckers, cross dressers, and helps drastically reduce the likeliness of you dating a gay man. It does for your dating selection process what your dad does when he cleans his shotgun by the door - instills the fear of God into your potential mates.

You might also like:

Pocket DoucheScan - for ladies on the go
DoucheScan Worldband - for ladies that travel abroad
DoucheScan PhD Edition - for ladies that come up against the best
DoucheScan Lavender Edition - helps eliminate men with sagging balls, small penises, venereal diseases, daddy or mommy complexes, men who watch Glee or listen to Britney Spears, dog fuckers, cross dressers, and helps drastically reduce the likeliness of you dating a closeted gay Republican.

If you act now, we will throw in our convenient Pocket Dictionary of DoucheBags at no additional cost!  This handy guide will give you the lo down on all various types of data output you can expect to encounter with DoucheScan.  If you are not thoroughly satisfied after trying DoucheScan for 30 days, you can return the DoucheScan for a full refund, and keep the Pocket Dictionary as our gift to you. 

For the next hour, the first 500 callers will get a SECOND DoucheScan to keep in your car, or in your vacation home for travel douchebag busting!

The DoucheScan is available in 3 easy payments of 19.99 + $5.00 shipping and handling.
No COD.

Make Checks Payable to

DoucheMasters Inventions
555 Ballbusting Lane
New York, NY