Thursday, October 8, 2009
MALE ARM CANDY WANTED...possibly with Toes to Suck - w4m - 36 (candyland/bmore)
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Do you have an arm? Does it taste like Candy? Will you hang out on my arm with your candilicious tasting arm? Does it taste like cherry? Because I prefer cherry. Bonus points if your arm is muscular, and not hairy. However, your legs can be hairy and your underarms, but not your back or your face.
Do you have toes? Do you want me to suck them? No? Good. Because I don't want to. Do you want to suck mine? No? Good, because I don't want you to. Apparently though, there are some guys on here that want to just find a woman and suck her toes. Let me put this out up front. I don't want to suck your toes, or have my toes sucked. I don't really want to even have you looking at my feet. They are quite cute, but that's not really the point.
Do you use Twitter? Yes? No? It doesn't really matter, because I don't. And if I did, I wouldn't want you to follow me. However, if you are very cute, have a foreign accent, and like outdoorsy activities and are in good shape, maybe I would want you to follow me.
Do you send random photos of your junk to women on the internet? Hey, that's great if you are the kind of person that likes to share. Just don't share with me.
Do you enjoy dried mangos and olive tapenade from Trader Joes? Do you wait until the shipment of said dried mangos arrives, and then purchase them in bulk quantity? Do you decide to try the chili spiced mango one day when you realize they are out of the regular ones, and realize they aren't an acceptable substitute?
Is your name Ray? If it is, don't email me. I do discriminate based on names. That is one name I won't date. Sorry, Rays of the World. One Ray ruined it all. If your name is something foreign that is hard to pronounce, that would be a lot of fun for me. I enjoy names and words I can't pronounce. Especially if you can say the name or other words with a strong accent. If you can do a really good fake accent, I might be interested as well.
I'm in my 30's. Don't be 50,60,70,80, or dead. Don't be still sucking your thumb either. I mean, who wants to deal with a drooling hot guy with nice arm muscles on her arm? It would make eating my dried mangos a bit more challenging...
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Spandexwhetter
This one is for Miss S. We refer to this one as Spandexwhetter. Why? Because he sent me the following photo and said that it was to "whet my appetite".
heh.
heh.
I've been propositioned!
Yet again...So I went on a date with this one guy. He was nice, normal, just not my type. So I cut the date short citing my desire to get up at 7am to go biking. He texted me several times post-date, which I ignored. Now keep in mind, I *am* looking to have a relationship at some point...just not with him. This is the recent email I got:
I'm not really an Insurance Broker. I'm a rocket surgeon, ops! I mean brain scientist.
Anyway, the point is I'm smart enough to know that you're not interested in a relationship. I don't blame you. You seem very mature. I'm pretty immature at the core. But at the end of the day I think you have a great body and a pretty face so I just wanted to know if you want to cum over. I'm discreet. No strings attached. Just let me know I'll give you my address.
P.S. I was going to text you a cock shot and say something like "I was just hanging around thinking about u." But I wasn't sure what your reaction would have been. I'm thinking you would think that's funny but you could have been disgusted, not sure.
Also, I used spell checker for you this time. That means I think you're special.
I'm not really an Insurance Broker. I'm a rocket surgeon, ops! I mean brain scientist.
Anyway, the point is I'm smart enough to know that you're not interested in a relationship. I don't blame you. You seem very mature. I'm pretty immature at the core. But at the end of the day I think you have a great body and a pretty face so I just wanted to know if you want to cum over. I'm discreet. No strings attached. Just let me know I'll give you my address.
P.S. I was going to text you a cock shot and say something like "I was just hanging around thinking about u." But I wasn't sure what your reaction would have been. I'm thinking you would think that's funny but you could have been disgusted, not sure.
Also, I used spell checker for you this time. That means I think you're special.
From a profile on PoF
Wow, I think spell checker is going to have to call 911 for an emergency visit:
Internet service and cell, 250 a month? If this really worth the aggravation? Seriously? I'm a regular guy, never been married, and no children, always dreamed of being married and having a child! Looking for that all American dream, the beautiful wife and kids! Growing up on a farm, has given so much divisibility! Country in my bones, and hard work in my hands, makes for a great strong mind and body! People come and go, I believe for a reason! What those reasons are, we may never figure out? It is our Jobs as people to learn our best from each and every past relationship, and try deep in our hearts to be the best we can be, no matter what the circumstances! Over come our short comings and better our selves along the way! If a person does these things and truly in thier hearts believes they are doing so, the people that have done them wrong, one day will see thier mistakes by your example! Leadership and guidance are what we as the people of this great country have been lacking, dead beat dads and the broken homes, destroyed marriages , so very sad! Just one of many reasons why I have chose not to marry in the past ! Now at 40 years old, I know deep down, I am ready for that ultimate commitment, to dedicate my life to that one women whom would steal my heart and hold on tight! To death do us part! Extremely powerful to me, and not taken lightly! If you are, FAKE, INSACURE, INTROVERTED, SELFISH, INSENCEATIVE, NONPASSIONATE, FULL OF PRIDE, LATE, NOT RESPONCEABLE, HATEFUL, NONCOMPASSIONATE, ABUSIVE, HOMELESS, ACOHOLIC, DRUG ADDICT, PROSTIUTE, CAM GIRL, STILL NOT OVER YOUR X, GOLD DIGGER, DRAMMA QUEEN, IMPOLITE, RACEIST, IDEALISTIC,ILMORAL, NO GOALS, Don't waist your time or mine! Thank you! BTW, I always reply to all emails, not matter what, and I expect the same in return! If I take MY TIME to email, I should expect the same in return, even just to say your not interested! Ignorance is as Ignorance does! Be considerate to others not matter who they are, one day you may run across thier paths and need them?
Internet service and cell, 250 a month? If this really worth the aggravation? Seriously? I'm a regular guy, never been married, and no children, always dreamed of being married and having a child! Looking for that all American dream, the beautiful wife and kids! Growing up on a farm, has given so much divisibility! Country in my bones, and hard work in my hands, makes for a great strong mind and body! People come and go, I believe for a reason! What those reasons are, we may never figure out? It is our Jobs as people to learn our best from each and every past relationship, and try deep in our hearts to be the best we can be, no matter what the circumstances! Over come our short comings and better our selves along the way! If a person does these things and truly in thier hearts believes they are doing so, the people that have done them wrong, one day will see thier mistakes by your example! Leadership and guidance are what we as the people of this great country have been lacking, dead beat dads and the broken homes, destroyed marriages , so very sad! Just one of many reasons why I have chose not to marry in the past ! Now at 40 years old, I know deep down, I am ready for that ultimate commitment, to dedicate my life to that one women whom would steal my heart and hold on tight! To death do us part! Extremely powerful to me, and not taken lightly! If you are, FAKE, INSACURE, INTROVERTED, SELFISH, INSENCEATIVE, NONPASSIONATE, FULL OF PRIDE, LATE, NOT RESPONCEABLE, HATEFUL, NONCOMPASSIONATE, ABUSIVE, HOMELESS, ACOHOLIC, DRUG ADDICT, PROSTIUTE, CAM GIRL, STILL NOT OVER YOUR X, GOLD DIGGER, DRAMMA QUEEN, IMPOLITE, RACEIST, IDEALISTIC,ILMORAL, NO GOALS, Don't waist your time or mine! Thank you! BTW, I always reply to all emails, not matter what, and I expect the same in return! If I take MY TIME to email, I should expect the same in return, even just to say your not interested! Ignorance is as Ignorance does! Be considerate to others not matter who they are, one day you may run across thier paths and need them?
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